The world is like a book. Not traveling is like only reading a page.: Funniest text ever

Mark and I moved to Naples, Italy on April 22, 2012. We will be there for three years and will be documenting all aspects of our crazy new life overseas. Enjoy! Ciao! -The Bakers

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Funniest text ever

I got this text from Kate on Thanksgiving Day…
This pretty much sums up many of the reasons why I love her…..

Just think, if the Indians would have given the Pilgrims a donkey instead of a turkey for Thanksgiving, we all would be getting a piece of ass today.

Ahh… I love you, Kate!

Posted by ::Tiffany Baker:: at 6:02 PM

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About Me

::Tiffany Baker::: This home is at 2005 Hulman Street, Terre Haute, IN 47803. It is for sale for $58,000. Call 812.841.6288 for more information.

View my complete profile

“The two greatest motivators of the human mind are the desire of good and the fear of evil.” -Samuel Johnson

Life is like a dogsled team. If you aren’t the leader, the scenery never changes.

If you think you are too small to make mistakes you have never been in a dark room with a mosquito.

6 Most important words: “I admit I made a mistake.”
5 Most important words: “You did a good job!”
4 Most important words: “What is your opinion?”
3 Most important words: “If you please.”
2 Most important words: “Thank you.”
1 Most important word: “We.”
Least important word: “I”

9/10 of reality is perception

Time waits for no one

There are three types of people in the world:
Ones who make things happen
Ones who watch things happen
Ones who ask “What Happened?”

Learn to take the sixteen inch trip … (16 inches from your brain to your heart)

“If you don’t have a fire in your belly, give it up.”

“They don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”

The most powerful things you have in your body are the words in your mouth.

“We want the facts to match the preconceptions. When they don’t, people tend to ignore the facts rather than change the preconceptions.”

“Nothing is easy to the unwilling.”

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe." -Albert Einstein

"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice." -Bill Cosby

"Somehow I can't believe that there are any heights that can't be scaled by a man who knows the secrets of making dreams come true. This special secret - curiosity, confidence, courage, and constancy, and the greatest of all is confidence. When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable."- Walt Disney

"Don't bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself." -William Faulkner

"When you're through changing, you're through."-Bruce Barton

"You are what you think about all day long." - Dr. Robert Schuller

"Ryan thinks that technology is the answer. Well guess what? I just drove my car into a lake... Why, you might ask, did I do this? Well, because of a machine [GPS]. A machine told me to drive into a lake and I did it. I did it because I trusted Ryan's precious technology, and look where it got me." -Michael, The Office, NBC

"Activity and sadness are incompatible." - Christian Bovee

"We have to understand that the world can only be grasped by action, not by contemplation. The hand is more important than the eye... The hand is the cutting edge of the mind." - Jacob Bronowski

"People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them." - George Bernard Shaw

"Act as if you have already achieved your goal and it is yours."- Dr. Robert Anthony

"Best ad ever: "Gimme a break, gimmie a break, break me off a piece of that ---" I'm totally blanking. What is the thing? ..."Claude-Van-Damme."..."Hair-For-Men".... "Poi-son-gas"... "Nu-Tri-Sweet"... It's got to rhyme with 'piece'... "Fan-Cy-Feast!" "Break me off a piece of that Fan-cy-Feast!" It's a cat food. Nailedit." -Andy, The Office, NBC

"People become really quite remarkable when they start thinking that they can do things. When they believe in themselves they have the first secret of success." - Norman Vincent Peale

"The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do." -Walter Bagehot

"Don't let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do." - John Wooden

"Some men go through life absolutely miserable because, despite the most enormous achievement, they just didn't do one thing-like the architect who didn't build St Paul's. I didn't quite build St Paul's, but I stood on more mountaintops than possibly I deserved." - Lord Thorneycroft

"Okay, the green bar is what you spend every month on stuff you need, like a car and a house... The red bar is what you spend on non-essentials, like magazines, entertainment, things like that.. This scary black bar is what you spend on things that no one ever ever needs. Like multiple magic sets, professional bass fishing equipment..." -Oscar to Michael, The Office, NBC

"Those who don't read good books have no advantage over those who can't." -Mark Twain

"We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done." - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

"There is one quality that one must possess to win, and that is definiteness of purpose, the knowledge of what one wants, and a burning desire to possess it." - Napoleon Hill

"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." - Aristotle

To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funnybone. ~Reba McEntire

Do It Afraid

The only way to have a life is to commit to it like crazy. ~Angelina JoliePremiere, quoted in Reader's Digest Quotable Quotes May 2002

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. ~Mark Twain

Living involves tearing up one rough draft after another. ~Author Unknown

Who will tell whether one happy moment of love or the joy of breathing or walking on a bright morning and smelling the fresh air, is not worth all the suffering and effort which life implies. ~Erich Fromm

I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer. ~Jim Carrey

When?

Life is like a coin. You can spend it any way you wish, but you only spend it once. ~Lillian Dickson

Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can. ~Danny Kaye

Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't. ~Richard Bach

The purpose of life is a life of purpose. ~Robert Byrne

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me." ~Erma Bombeck

“Like all great travelers, I have seen more than I remember, and remember more than I have seen.” - Benjamin Disraeli

“To travel is to discover that everyone is wrong about other countries.” - Aldous Huxley

“A journey is best measured in friends, rather than miles.” - Tim Cahill

“To my mind, the greatest reward and luxury of travel is to be able to experience everyday things as if for the first time, to be in a position in which almost nothing is so familiar it is taken for granted.” - Bill Bryson

Opinions

“If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion and avoid the people, you might better stay at home.” - James Michener

God's Child

“Tourists don’t know where they’ve been, travelers don’t know where they’re going.” - Paul Theroux

"Life is too short to be sad, mad, or boring."
-Tiffany